This is a book - I am sorry I just needed to get this out of my system.
Delays = Bad Mood
So I headed down there with plans on riding both horses knowing that its alot to squeeze into 2 hours and just wouldn't you know it it had to be a rainy crapy day 
(I'm talking down pour not sprinkles - which any cowgirl should be able to ride through) which means in order to ride we had to ride inside, which also means we had to haul to a nearby indoor arena to ride, which meant that it pushed our riding time back like an hour! That irritated me, but then I found out that we would not be meeting Joe at the indoor arena we would be meeting him at the barn - and helping to load horses (adding irritation here) as it pushes our riding time and my eventual bed time out even further. Then I found out that he was not at the barn when we were got there and he had all the saddles in the trailer with him so we couldn't saddle the horses to get them ready to load by the time we got there. More irritation. 
Then a snarky thought crossed my mind. I remember my friend Calie mentioning that she couldn't ride with us because her mom and her were doing a 4-H practice that night so they were riding earlier that day. I would be willing to bet that the reason why he was running behind was because he took thier horses over there to ride and left ours for another trip at the barn. Well he showed up to the barn not even 10 minutes after we did (bonus - good hussle Joe 
) but when he unloaded Stella and Sport - my friend and her mothers' horse - I knew that is exactly what happened. I hate being right. I don't know all the circumstances so I can't say for sure why he didn't just take those 2 horses to the barn plus our 4 for one trailer load and have them all there but I figure it had to do with him wanting to show my friends' mom a horse to possible buy - because that one was in there too. Showing that horse could've been accomplished another day, in my opinion they live fairly close to Lewiston compared to the 3 of us ladies who are all a good 2.5-3 hours away and can only come down once a week if we carpool.
Bad Mood = Bad Ride 
Ok so I freely admitt by the time I rode at 7:40 pm that I was in a bad mood (usually when I go down to ride I ride from 6 to 8 pm and am home and in bed by 10:30 pm). I knew I would not be in bed before midnight, and would have to wake up at 4:30 in the morning to go to work on 3.5 hours of sleep and feel like absolute crap for the next two days. I don't care who you are that just SUCKS. 
So after lunging Patrick while Joe rode Stretch around for a bit, I got on Stretch and trotting around "ok" but then he lost his cadience and we struggled with that for the rest of the lesson, and then we worked on the walk because it seems that Stretch is now struggling with everything Western. I could not pay that horse to walk slowly last night and had to invest time actually practicing the walk. Then we worked on neck reining which went okay aside from him speeding up while turning at the trot. Next we worked on loping which was awful, not only did he not pick up his "pleasure" lope for me he really didn't even want to give me one while we worked on it - was running off, not staying collected and farting around with his head. Joe is trying to talk me through all of the this and sometimes it's just too much. There just seems like there is too much I have to do to get him to lope correctly and all the while I have to keep in mind all the other stuff about keeping him slow, keeping his neck down, and on and on - sometimes my mind just shuts down and while I try I am not trying 100%. I get to feeling like "what's the point?" Its hard on me its hard on Stretch....
Well after 10 minutes of these Joe getting sick of it and jumps on Stretch and tunes him up really good. Stretch was surprised at first after having his way with me about actually having to mind and do his job - but is reponsive and shapes up. But I feel bad because I had a hand in getting him in trouble. When Joe gave him back to me he told me to Cowgirl-Up and get the job done, which I did - I got on and gave it 100% and had a better ride, and so maybe needed I to be told that. But i was not impressed with his lope as Joe was riding and knew he was loping the same way with me. All quick in the front in and WAY too much knee.
Bad Ride =Change in plans?
I just overall was real unhappy with my ride and I am now wondering to myself why this should be so tough for Stretch and me. It seems stupid to struggle with this crap so much when he is so good English I know that keeping his western skills up will help his resale value (cause he's not a tall enough horse to be a serious HUS horse) but if he will eventually go to my niece do I need to worry about that? Do I want him going to my niece? I don't want her to have to struggle with something as simple as the "jog" while she learning to ride regardless how good-hearted of a horse he is. I am really kinda wanting to just dump all the western stuff and just go english with him until the end of the year then sell him. It just exhausts me - it makes riding not fun. Other western pleasure horses and even Horsemanship horses do not struggle like Stretch does, it just kill me to see how easy some horses are and how tough it is to make Stretch do things.
Don't know what to do....I am so fustrated!! Another gal in Todd's barn purchased a horse for $8000 to be a pleasure horse and he is turning out to make a great pleasure horse. My parent's purchased Stretch for me to replace my horse that died in the barn fire last year for way more, on Joe's recommendation and he can't even do Western Pleasure (which is supposed to be my thing). I can't change this - it just adds to my fustration ALOT. I am glad we can do some HUS and be competitive with it - but dang it! I wasn't planning on going back to Hunt Seat horses and now that seems like all I got.
Pat needs yet even more time...
Then there is Patrick - I rode him last night to see how far he is coming along. Since he never stopped growing and has a big engine in him he is looking like he sadly just going to be a Hunt Seat horse. I am hoping he is going to be a tough Hunt Seat horse, but the truth is we just really don't know yet because he is still growing is real big and uncoordinated and immature mentally. I had hoped maybe I could show him in this next upcoming show in a Futurity but last nights ride dashed those hopes. He is sooooooo not ready. I had to long trot him into a gallop which was hard to maintain - he really didn't show that he was ready to slow down to a canter after I got him to gallop. He ramdomly stops while galloping which just about sends me up his neck - and his head set is really not there at all. So I can forget showing him - there is way more than two weeks worth of work to do on him.
I would just really like to see more progress in Patrick since he's been in full time training since the fall of his yearling year minus 2 months. I am the biggest fan of waiting for horses to be ready before being shown so I haven't been wanting to push him, but gosh - I have been waiting for awhile...plus I am so ready to start winning again and I am hoping Pat is going to be that horse. I was hoping I could take him to Vegas in the Spring and compete in my first big show - but I am NOT doing that until he has proven to me the he can compete down there. So it seems Vegas is slipping further and further from the picture.
Why no pressure for Pat to do WP? Well....he is special - was raised as a baby at my folks' place and I will accept whatever he is good at and give it a shot. Was hoping with his breeding it would be WP but it turns out that will most likely be Hunter Under Saddle. I did not purchase him specifically to do Western Pleasure I bred him in hopes that he would, there is a little difference.
What to do?
I need to confer with my folks and see what they would like to see happen with Stretch - if they want to keep him for Katerina it would mean a significant finacially committment on their part as he couldn't just sit out in the pasture until she is ready for walk-trot classes. But they should have the choice - after all they bought him.
I need to talk to Joe and discuss my options again after I have gotten a good nights sleep and think about it some more.
I could show Stretch to the end of the year in just english - enjoy myself - sell the stupid horsemanship shirt, and put him up for sale this fall (if my parents don't want him). Which is sad because I love him, but I'm feeling like I need to continue to move forward in my show career - after my 8 year lual (subject for another post). I could sell my truck and trailer and combine that with the money from Stretch to purchase a new truck and trailer combo which I badly need. I combo that I could count on to hual me to and from bigger shows - hopefully with Patrick?
In the end I need to have one horse anyway because that is all I really can afford. And to make a long story even longer - I got to bed last night at 1:00 am, woke the heck up at 4:30 am, feel like crap and am in the worst mood....
Kudos to anyone who actaully reads this whole thing - any advice?