I know this topic is proabaly on here a million times but I need help really bad!

My heels ride up on me almost all the time. If I let my weight sink into them totally, it leaves almost a 45 degree angle between my toe and chin. I am really flexible.  My instructor says that I ride on my feet a lot and that I swing my leg back, which causes me to lean forward which puts weight on my horses shoulders and causes him to get frustrated and ignore my signal to canter. But if I don't pull my leg back I feel as though I can't reach him. If I put my leg on his girth then from the top of my boot down (I have paddock boots) I feel like I'm not touching him. And trying to "wrap my legs around him" causes my knees and thighs to come off the saddle which is a huge no no. Also, my feet slip through the sturrips all the time because I raise my legs and that makes my heels go way up. Does anyone know any exersices or something I can do to help this? Major is incredibaly bouncy, so no-sturrip work is very difficult ad leaves me bouncing everywhere since I can't sit trot on him for the death of me. Show season is right around the corner and I really need to get this right like now!!!

I have never had the problem of keeping my heels down and most people would say I am over-flexing my ankle but its just my conformation, so my tip to you is just something from my head that I think would work. Raise your stirrup leathers about four or five holes past your normal length. As you practice riding like that, you may find that when you have your weight pressed onto the balls of your feet on the stirrup, you'll tip foward a lot especially at the faster gaits. Concentrate on keepin you heels down so that your weight goes past your toes and down into you heels which will give you a more secure feeling. The more you notice that you are able to keep you heels down, slowly over time lower the holes until eventually you notice that you are back at your origional hole.

I hope this helps!! 

No stirrup work is supposed to be extremely difficult and is EXACTLY what I'd tell you to do.  You shouldn't have to sit his trot without stirrups, post like you normally would.  Yes it's hard, yes it will hurt, yes you won't be able to walk right for 2 days afterwards...but it will tremendously help your riding.  Start slow, but be consistent about it.  Do a lap or two each ride at a posting trot with no stirrups and gradually build up your strength, no stirrup canter work will also help.  When you get better you can take the stirrups completely off your saddle.  (My trainer used to hide every pair of stirrups and leathers in the barn for MONTHS at a time, and we still took our lessons as normal, 4ft courses on large strided hard to sit horses and all (well not me, I was never good enough to do 4ft courses period, but some of the other riders were)).

Yup, definetely work without stirrups. It'll take time and effort but once you find your balance, you'll find that your legs will naturally fall into the correct position and stay there. Personally, I love working with stirrups. Although it is difficult to do at the beginning, it work wonders for me..

Goodluck !

I have to echo everyone here.... there's nothing that can improve and strengthen legs like riding without stirrups! I know it's pretty difficult on a bumpy horse though. If it helps could you get someone to put you on a lunge line as you do it? 

Another exercise to strengthen legs (with stirrups) is to ride in your 2 point (or half seat). It really shows how moving your legs back throws your body forward, legs forward throws your body back. You simply can't stay up and balanced in a correct half seat if your leg isn't in the right place. It will also allow your heels to stretch (just relax your ankles and let them drop down, don't force them or your leg will push forward) Step 2 would be to get up into your half seat and squeeze your calves and thighs, but NOT your heels or it will drive your horse forward! If you do it right your horse shouldn't go forward. It's an isometric exercise that's pretty difficult when you do it correctly. Practice squeezing and counting to 10, increasing as your legs get stronger. Geof Teall describes this excerise in one of his books if you look it up. (i wish i could remember which one)

My coach recently (the 17th) noticed that for the past year I've been using the wrong muscles in my calf. She has me going back to pushing my heels down and my toes in and holding this in 2-point during my warm-up. When my legs feel stable, I half-post for 4-5 strides. If I'm able to keep my legs (and heels) in place then I go posting. If not, back to 2-point. Also work on this at the walk sitting. I also ditto no stirrups (sitting, posting, and 2-point). This is the only way that I'm able to bend my legs around any horse (heels down, toes in).